How We Montessori Blog Post

"We all want the best for our children but over time I've learnt that comparing our children is not helpful, it can be potentially harmful, we need to respect each child for where they are at and to meet them right there."

Here are a few things that I try to remember when I catch myself making comparisons:

• We need to respect the child's individual timeline, respect the child's individual developmental needs.
• Every child learns at their own pace. 
• Remember that your child is not you and that siblings may be very different too. Just because one child was reading at three the next may not be, and that is ok. 
• Don't rush the child, they will do it when they are ready and not before. Rushing or forcing it isn't helpful. 
• We need to have realistic expectations. Unrealistic expectations put pressure on yourself (the parent) and the child and will often lead to frustration and disappointment.
• Try to live in the moment, appreciate where your child is at right now.
• We can look ahead to the next step, the next milestone to prepare the environment, have materials and knowledge ready but wait until the right time to present it.  
• Be aware of age recommendations, they are important but are a guide only, just because the egg and cup are recommended from six months, your child may not be ready for it until they are nine or ten months.
• By presenting materials the child is not ready for we are not only not meeting their current developmental needs, we are sending them a harmful message that you are not good enough and we need or expect more from you. 
• Celebrate milestones and achievements of your child and that of children around you. Children and parents are often proud of their achievements such as when the child first walks or reads their first chapter book. 
• Distance yourself from or keep your thoughts in check if you have particularly competitive friends, there are some people who can make parenting feel like a competition, this isn't helpful or healthy. 

READ THE ARTICLE